HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015419.jpg
1.11 MB
Extraction Summary
4
People
1
Organizations
0
Locations
0
Events
0
Relationships
2
Quotes
Document Information
Type:
Essay / article draft / manuscript page
File Size:
1.11 MB
Summary
This document appears to be a page from a humorous essay or article, likely written by satirist Paul Krassner, found within a House Oversight Committee document production. The text discusses the author's failed attempts to coin new linguistic terms (specifically 'toast' for money) and name a body part after himself ('Krassner's crease'), while referencing other (possibly satirical) figures who successfully named medical terms.
People (4)
| Name | Role | Context |
|---|---|---|
| Paul Krassner | Author |
Implied author of the text based on the reference to 'Krassner's crease'.
|
| Dr. Harold Cerumen | Doctor (likely satirical) |
Mentioned as the person who named 'cerumen disimpaction'.
|
| Alice Neuticle | Veterinarian (likely satirical) |
Mentioned as the person who coined 'neuticles'.
|
| Casper Bartholin | Anatomist |
Mentioned as the namesake for 'Bartholin's glands'.
|
Organizations (1)
| Name | Type | Context |
|---|---|---|
| House Oversight Committee |
Indicated by the footer stamp 'HOUSE_OVERSIGHT'.
|
Full Extracted Text
Complete text extracted from the document (1,166 characters)
Words and Phrases That I’ ve Coined
I really don’ t like to boast, but in my lifetime, on half a dozen occasions, I have actually added words and phrases to the language. It’ s something I always wanted to do. What a thrill it must have been for Dr. Harold Cerumen, who decided that cleaning out earwax should be known as “cerumen disimpaction.” And veterinarian Alice Neuticle who coined the word “neuticles” —cosmetic testicles for a dog that’ s been neutered.
So I’ m not asking for credit. Or cash. Since money had been called “dough” and then morphed into “bread,” I figured that “toast” would be the next logical step in that particular linguistic evolution, but my campaign itself became toast, in the sense that “toast” now means history.
Also, I was intrigued by the process of having a body part named after oneself. How proud Casper Bartholin’ s parents must have been to have a son who christened the source of female lubrication that takes the friction out of intercourse as “Bartholin’ s glands.” But my idea of calling those two vertical lines between your nose and your mouth “Krassner’ s crease” just never became popular.
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_015419
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