HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_021184.jpg

but laugh, I hoped he didn’t expect the same treatment back. Through my recent experiences with Rena, I drew a line with extreme fetishes, especially ones that would involve my tongue and feet in the same sentence. It wasn’t hard to get him wound up to the point where he just wanted to have the rest of me so we dried off from the cold and retired to my bedchambers for the longest ten minutes of my life. Moments later and without any real emotional attachment, he burst in ecstasy, leaving me to my own feelings of dismay. As relieved as I was to see the experience come to pass with him, it was finally sinking in that I would never be anything more than but a muse. Still trying to ascertain a surreal dream a young girl once held but no longer the same girl I was no longer sure that the dream was even real anymore. In the whirlwind thrown together by wealth, power, and privilege I was but a grain of sand and felt helpless down the road I was naively being led down. When the real picture was unveiled, later in my life, I had nothing but memories filled with sorrow to remember of my teenage years.

Jeffrey, Ghislane, and I left for the states to conclude our long journey home to the U.S.A. I was so happy when we landed on our soil and called T.J from my cell phone to see if he’d meet me at the airport instead of going back to Jeffrey’s, he’d be there within twenty minutes, he was so happy to hear my voice and that I was back in town. So ecstatic to be getting away from my life of servitude for the next few days, I was sourly disappointed when I got off the phone. As if he’d been listening to my entire conversation, Jeffrey told me he’d like a massage back at his place and he could pay me at the same time for my trip with him. With much dismay I had to call T.J back and cancel the arrangements, I wouldn’t see him until later that night, in which one of Jeffrey’s staff would drive me home and I would be too exhausted to do anything.

Chapter 12

When we got back to Jeffrey’s mansion in Palm Beach he wanted to thank me for showing his friend, the Prince, such a good time. Rewarding my diligence with an extra sum of money and luring me deeper into his goal of keeping me at his side as his personal amusement that he could lend out at anytime. Further proving his capability of using the vulnerable impressions of a young girl to influence and intimidate his fellow peers of

[Page Break / Column Break]

like minds. Jeffrey didn’t want to know the grim details of how it all happened on my intimate night with the Prince, he just asked simply if I thought that I did well in keeping his friend happy. Knowing already that the evaluation of my performance I gave was already discussed between them, I just as simply replied back with a nod of approval. Though I did have a laugh with Jeffrey about the Prince’s weird fixation on my feet and lets just say that he was quite tickled with Andrew’s quirky obsession, having a good ol’chuckle at my eccentric encounter. I was paid extremely well this time, putting my money earned into nothing but popping pills and alcohol by shouting my so called friends a good time, aiming for the attempt to forget about my experiences abroad. I partied like that to feel young again, my age and most of all to self-anesthetize my troubles from within. It wasn’t like I was waiting for someone to arrive on his white horse and take me away to a magical world. I simply yearned for more out of life than being someone’s replaceable amusement. Still a romantic at heart I would often get lost in my daydreams, imagining a new beginning with a strong man that would show me an enduring love, safety in his arms, and a lifetime friendship. Though the suggestion of true loves existence was only a dream for now, something I could only read about in novelistic fairytales but the passing thought from time to time was warmly envisioned. With my inner most desires being locked away in a deep crevice of my heart, I knew my romantic notions would be absurd in Jeffrey’s eyes. For some unknown reason to me he couldn’t allow himself to give love or receive someone’s heart in return. Once he said to me when I asked him if he ever thought he would settle down and find Mrs. Right and he told me he didn’t believe that love with one monogamous partner was possible but he found that love with many was. I thought at the time it had something to do with having so much money and everyone wanting him for that instead of seeing him as a person and even felt bad for him, but now I can understand from his recent lessons unlearned that it was a simple equation of his twisted perversion to become infatuated with the vulnerable youth off the streets. Spending so much time in the entrapment of Jeffrey’s embrace, I was becoming numb to the feelings and aspiration to ever climb above this deep hole I had dug myself into. I knew I wanted to escape from this bizarre form of first class slavery but I still didn’t have the tools necessary to help me get out. How could I have? Everyone that knew me believed I was living this enchanting life, a rags to riches success story that most people dream of, only I knew the price to be paid for all of this and I was the only one who could pay for it. Underestimating my true self, I was settled by Jeffrey’s side for now considering him to be someone to look up to, my mentor. Such a

79
Copyright Protected Material CONFIDENTIAL
GIUFFRE004212

80
Copyright Protected Material CONFIDENTIAL
GIUFFRE004213
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_021184